Mom: Gavin did you brush your teeth?
Gavin: Yes
Mom: Gavin??? (with a look that says -- tell me the truth)
Gavin: No, I"ll go do it
Libbie: mmmm, I LOVE this chicken
Mom: I'm so glad you do!
(the truth was it was pork, but I didn't want to spoil the LOVE)
Dad eats a Reeses Peanut Butter Cup and heads upstairs....this is what Mom hears from downstairs
Libbie: Mmm, why do I smell Reese Peanut Butter Cup?
Dad: You don't!
Libbie: Yes, I do
Dad: No you don't!
Now I ask -- when is a lie okay to lie? Should I really have to tell her it's pork when it's chicken?? The kids like to tell white lies to us and we correct them (as long as we figure it out) but then we're hypocrites because we are still telling our lies. My personality tends to be black and white. This concept has both helped me to progress and hindered me.
At this point in time I'm gonna choose grey-- I'm pretty sure I'd tell Libbie she couldn't smell peanut butter cup either.:)
3 comments:
We all do it, white lies are just that. Sometimes, it is just easier. Not always right, but easier.
We've been telling our kids that a red light glows on their forheads when they're not telling the truth. Only moms and dads can see it (I learned this trick from a past YW). All I have to do is say, "let me see your forehead" and I know by the way they react if they're telling the truth. It still works like a charm... but I'm starting to feel a lot of guilt for lying to them when the very thing I'm getting after them for is lying. How's that for a lengthy confession from a hypocritical mother? You probably feel much better about the chicken/pork lie!
Having had MUCH experience with lies (I know I'm the world's biggest sucker!) I have to err on the side of being too strict. I know some things don't feel like they are so important but you will think differently when/if lying becomes acceptable in their minds. As long as it not mutually known "lying" like in teasing, I really don't think it should be acceptable..just my opinion. Plus, what about the mutual respect thing? Doesn't telling the truth always have something to do with that??
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